Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize