Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Randomize
