There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
