Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
