i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
