If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
