Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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