my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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