Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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