AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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