Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"

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  (503): my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal" http://tfl.nu/pkcw
  Replies (12) Good night (5374) Bad night (706)
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  (650): View more from California

  I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.

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  (650): I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one. http://tfl.nu/s8l0
  Replies (9) Good night (4084) Bad night (572)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.

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  (703): so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine. http://tfl.nu/s4y5
  Replies (25) Good night (10260) Bad night (1476)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.

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  (678): I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities. http://tfl.nu/k0mm
  Replies (12) Good night (2920) Bad night (754)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds

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  (914): I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds http://tfl.nu/eevd
  Replies (4) Good night (1242) Bad night (1293)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.

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  (908): Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more. http://tfl.nu/qarz
  Replies (6) Good night (504) Bad night (1310)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.

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  (773): I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea. http://tfl.nu/j1n0
  Replies (9) Good night (532) Bad night (1564)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?

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  (940): Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments? http://tfl.nu/lsft
  Replies (3) Good night (1165) Bad night (546)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.

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  (214): I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted. http://tfl.nu/jl70
  Replies (6) Good night (1406) Bad night (404)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...

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  (541): After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video... http://tfl.nu/lvkq
  Replies (3) Good night (620) Bad night (635)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.

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  (850): I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet. http://tfl.nu/wt7c
  Replies (3) Good night (629) Bad night (328)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?

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  (770): So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night? http://tfl.nu/hytr
  Replies (3) Good night (488) Bad night (273)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Got another job?

  (607): View more from New York

  If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.

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  (740): Got another job? (607): If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job. http://tfl.nu/7dk4
  Replies (1) Good night (590) Bad night (238)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does

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  (561): I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does http://tfl.nu/w0y1
  Replies (0) Good night (396) Bad night (206)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean

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  (401): So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean http://tfl.nu/7uwn
  Replies (2) Good night (402) Bad night (172)

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