Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
