problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
The feeling are messing with the penis
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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