We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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