How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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