It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Randomize
