so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
So many bounce houses so little time
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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