Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
