Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
