By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
