Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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