Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
