I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
