She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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