It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
