perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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