It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
