So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
