Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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