Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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