none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Porn is love you can see.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Randomize
