It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
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