Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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