I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
