So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
