Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
