we have officially lost it.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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