Porn is love you can see.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
