I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
