Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
