I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
