sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Randomize