Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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