I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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