Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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