Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
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