areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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