Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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