Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
two words: eviction party
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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