i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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